I went to a yoga class for the first time in many months. a free class in a nice studio, all levels of ability and experience: no excuse not to go. anyway, at the end the instructor was very good at helping us with a simple meditation, one of just breathing and noticing, to not get caught up in thinking or feeling the "right" thing, but just noticing. the part that really stood out for me was when he asked the question, "Where are you?" i was all over ...
I tend to lose interest in things and move on to something else. Usually I start a project and then fail to finish it, which apparently has been a pattern my whole life. The amazing part, and what I fail to understand, is that I was under the care of a therapist and psychiatrist. I was on an anti-depressant (I can't remember which one I was on exactly, but during the course of my life I have been on all of them from A to Zoloft). I would tell them how I feel and how I was doing. My therapist and ...
I wish I had something more uplifting to blog about, for the sake of others, but I feel that I have to be honest (or as honest as possible) when blogging. I recently had to drop out of school and as far as long term goals go (and heck, as far as ANY goals go whatsoever) I would have to say I don't have any. To be honest, (there's that honesty I mentioned earlier) I have been contemplating suicide but what else is new. I contemplate suicide practically everyday, on average. I have been ...
behind on blogging here, same w/ writing in my journal. trying to be easy on myself, considering i'm still adjusting to another new med and all. so far no more seizures, so that's a relief. i got a call late last night from j, my ex. it was probably around 3am in his time zone. i assumed it was a drunk dial and didn't pick up. i finally listened to the message this morning, and i hate that i was right. the familiar slur to his voice, the one i came to recognize even when he could fool ...
Video of me playing Death Spirit Crusher <object width="400" height="300"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="movie" value="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=10403230&server=vimeo.co m&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_port rait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" /><embed ...
just a quick one, trying to fill in application for next yr still... done all the easy bits like personal details and jobs (altho thats hard enough trying to make it look like am more experienced than i am!) but trying to write personal statement... a work colleague even wrote me a spider diagram today of what to put in it.. a whole side of a4 full of my good qualities and i still cant focus and get anything written.. ive got proper butterflies in my stomach, feeling really nervous... ...
I think people wonder, when I mention DSPS, so I will explain what it is. Delayed sleep phase syndrome is when your body clock doesn't match societies habits and demands. A delay of only 2 hours is diagnostic, but most people with that little delay, do not know they have DSPS. Usually people with more severe problems from the affliction have a delay of 4 to up to 8 hours. Total reverse of day (12 hour delay) can also happen. That means, the person actually can sleep, ...
I was doing homework yesterday (like I should be now, right?) and I was listening to the internet radio. I have been trying to wean myself off of really vulgar and angsty hard rock. It hasn't been very good for my mood - imagine that! So, I was listening to Christian rock (same sound, better message) and I heard this song... and it was like God himself was speaking to me. yes. this is me. this is what I wanted to say to my counselor the other day but couldn't. It isn't about being strong - which ...
so, the work has begun.. no more messing around on the computer allday been sorting out and organising uni stuff this morning.. theres so much im going to have to do dont know how im going to fit it all in alongside my increasing responsibilities at work!! am sure will find a way somehow tho... here's hoping! am going to really try and not stress myself out over it this yr as it ended up being rather counter productive and my work was of a far better standard when i wasnt stressing! just been ...
started uni today, only induction day so no work, just lots of being talked at and going to rooms I'll never remember where they are and being bombarded with information and paperwork! Just slightly overwhelming! Just glad I already ad friends from last2 yrs at college which took away 1 anxiety! I thought I was doing a good job of cool, calm and collected, which i was until i completely switched off from what was being said as totally overwhelmed and suddenly realised i had no sense of direction ...
still feeling out of sorts... tis strange... spending my evenings literally just sat at the computer to stop myself from thinking about stuff too much and generally a bit of a hibernating grumpy cow, but my days at work are fab... had such a good week with the kiddies and really enjoyed teaching them...i get such satisfaction and self worth when i can see the enjoyment on children's faces when they are learning, that eagerness and captivation... it really is magic and i love instilling that in kids, ...
I wanted to write a blog and now gone all shy and embarrased!! lol, thats a first! I cant explain what I want to say, or more like don't want to admit to it..grrr!! These days am doing soo good and am loving my life I've built up for myself I really am! Yes I wish it would move quicker and fast forward a couple of years and take me to where I really want to be but I know thats an impossibility outside my power unless I could somehow build a time machine! But, there's still this bit ...
Depression is a lot like a rollercoaster ride... probably more like a kiddie ride compared to what bi-polar is like (?) but nonetheless... it seems to sneak up on you slowly... You see that damned depressive mood coming around the corner, and you think that you can handle it. You think that you can escape it this time. You think that just maybe you're seeing things... And then you wake up one morning and yup. Here you are again. That depressive hellhole. A rollercoaster in the dark. no neon lights. ...
Psychedelic fears <object width="400" height="300"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="movie" value="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=10402999&server=vimeo.co m&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_port rait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" /><embed src="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=10402999&server=vimeo.co m&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_port rait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" ...
where the cows go bong, and the monkeys all say boo!! that's my favourite spike millian poem ever! did it with the kiddies last yr and they made up their own nonsense poems.. they were fab! anyway... just want to start a blog up! nothing much to say at the moment... sat here fiddling on here rather than cooking teas and making lunch for tomorrow, having a shower and ironing clothes for tomorrow... but shh!! this place is far more exciting than any of that... lol! ...
Video of me playing Havest by Opeth <object height="300" width="400"> <embed src="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=10402745&server=vimeo.com&sh ow_title=1&show_byline=1&show_portrait=0&color=&fu llscreen=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" height="300" width="400"></object>Opeth - Harvest ...
Updated March 28th, 2010 at 7:35 AM by GuitarGirl
Ok here is video I made. It is a cover of Suicide Note Part 1 by Pantera. <object width="400" height="300"><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><param name="movie" value="http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=10402594&server=vimeo.co m&show_title=1&show_byline=1&show_port rait=0&color=&fullscreen=1" ...
I just discovered this blog. I'm a little slow I guess. I didn't realize everyone had their own. What a blessing... So, for my first entry, I would like to introduce myself, my situation and perhaps end with some song lyrics that I just thought about all day yesterday during a really low day and it seemed to help. I have been suffering from depression all my life really. I've never been officially diagnosed, ok, but I am not stupid. I have been fed all sorts of stories ...
At least about six million people have depression in the united states annually. This depression is more common in women than men. As a result of this, it has led many to believe that men are not easily depressed. This is far from the truth. In the medical community, there is no differentiation between the number of depression in both men and women. A reason it is so could be that men are diagnosed differently from women. For most men, symptoms are generally common ones which can be easily diagnosed ...
support group is a group of similar people going through the same bout of depression. In supports groups, you will have a listening ear to problems you are passing through and also find people who are going through similar problems with you so that it can enable you to share your experiences with them. You will find most depression groups at counseling centers. Some groups meetings are held at least once a week. Most discussions at these group meetings entails how depression affects ...
Depression comes in different forms and stages and it affect men and women differently. The signs of depression can come in different ways which can be undetectable. People frequently associate a depressed person with sadness. Another sign people look for is been extremely introverted with suicidal cues. Depression signs can come in so many forms, it could come as an extremely happy person, overly nice person, too much energy etc. Having another illness coupled with depression can also make the ...
Without a doubt, women are more prone to depression than men because they are more emotional than men. The sad fact is that this depression in women is hard to overcome. They are certain type of depression associated with women which are very common. Below are some of the type of depression which are mostly common in women. Post-Natal Depression: You normally find this type of depression associated with pregnancy. It occurs after women have given birth. It can be caused by a drastic ...
Did you wake up in the middle in the night asking yourself, "Am I depressed?". If you are asking yourself such questions, then maybe you have started noticing certain changes in yourself. The best way to know if you are depressed is knowing the signs of depression. If depression are left untreated, it could develop into a major depression. It is easier to treat depression in the early stages. Here are certain clues to know if you are depressed. Do you feel unexplained ...
Health is defined as a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity. A sound mind in a sound body has been recognized as a social ideal for many centuries. The Indian sages and seers had paid particular attention to the unconscious; wherein lay the suppressed unfulfilled desires and compulsions of several kinds which led the individual astray; by mastering their minds, they attained the highest levels of emotional equilibrium. Mental ...
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