I am feeling so blue today

[storky]

Today is a dark day. I can't seem to shake this really dark mood I have. One part loneliness, one part hopelessness, two parts sadness. On the weekends I take off the mask and feel the pain I am denying all week. I'm trying to get things done so that at least I will feel good about that. But my pessimism about the future makes me feel like I am wasting my time. I am so tired of being alone and yet I want to be alone. I wish I could just make time stop so that I could sleep for a few days and then come back to face life. But I can't and every moment just feels painful.

[Britt]

I'm hearing you, Storky!! I am sorry that you are having a bad day, and by the time you receive this hug ( ) I hope you are feeling at least a little better. Sounds like during the week you work and have to present a cheery front ....? I can understand of your being tired of being alone BUT wanting to be alone as well. I guess that relating to people can be difficult at times, can't it! Relationships can be tricky at the best of times. But you express yourself very well in the written word, and I encourage you to keep doing so.

[Ashes]

Hi Storky,
I feel that way a lot. It seems that Im so tired all of the time. All I want to do is sleep and cant. I have said many times I feel like I want to sleep for days. Hoping that when I got up things would have improved.

[NewieKay]

Holy cow I came online for the same reason...it''s like you could have written my post. I really wish you were not feeling the same way. About taking time off, is there a chance that you could at least take a "mental health day" so that you could sleep in/ relax/recharge? My hope for you is that the next moment gives you some breathing room and is pain free.

[scaredbezzy]

storky i couldnt i dentify more with what you typed.i too crave being alone because then i dont have to explain whay and how i feel.i want to sleep so i dont have to feel the way i do and have to face another day of feeling so sad.i try to do things to be proud of but someone else can and will always do it better than me.i feel so worthless,sad,hopeless and useless.i dont feel anything i say or do is ever good enough or will ever be good enough
i am currently my dads carer alone with the help of a friend and for now thats my reason for being but when hes gone what will be the point of me when hes gone i will have no purpose and there will be no need for me to live so why bother
sorry to sound morbid but its how i feel
storky you are by no means alone i hope we can both find some peace one day
sb xxx

[TJS]

Me Too!! I could have written that post about me Storky!

I'm so sorry your feeling lonely, it's tough isn't it. Also the sense of wasting your time that you talk about I can really identify with.

[Devon]

Maybe its just the way it feels when we're depressed. I finally colored my hair, took a hot bath, and went to bed for a few hours in the late afternoon. My dog woke me up at about 7pm and we walked around the neighborhood. My back was hurting and it feels better now.

I have to go to work tomorrow. So far as I know there are 3 weeks left in my temp assignment. On the one hand I hope its extended so I still have a job for a few more months at least. On the other hand if it ends I will be better able to look for a job I really want and I should still be eligible for unemployment comp. I just wish they would tell me soon.

Every day should be a mental health day when someone is depressed!

[Timothy]

Maybe its just the way it feels when we're depressed. I finally colored my hair, took a hot bath, and went to bed for a few hours in the late afternoon. My dog woke me up at about 7pm and we walked around the neighborhood. My back was hurting and it feels better now.

I have to go to work tomorrow. So far as I know there are 3 weeks left in my temp assignment. On the one hand I hope its extended so I still have a job for a few more months at least. On the other hand if it ends I will be better able to look for a job I really want and I should still be eligible for unemployment comp. I just wish they would tell me soon.

Every day should be a mental health day when someone is depressed!

Depression is a debilitating illness and deserves to be seen for what it is, an illness, not an excuse for why you aren't able to come into work. The world is built completely wrong, the rich get richer , the poor get poorer and the sick get sicker. Hopefully one day people suffering from depression will have the support of the government completely, not be seen as a liability.

I hope that your job is extended and at the same time you are able to look for a new one that makes you happy