At a young age I realized I was not normal and that I didn't fit in with anyone else. Over the years I learned to watch other people and to mimic their behavior. Normal people might find this weird, but for me when to laugh, when to smile, when to frown, when to cry, when to and how to display emotions of any type was a learned behavior. The emotions I show is what I think is the appropriate emotion to show is based on watching other people in similiar past situations. This has been a long learning
I had never even heard of the term Schizoid until about a year ago. It turns out a "Secret" Schizoid is someone that blends into the world and pretends to be a normal or at least not a schizoid person to others. That has been me my entire life. If you don't know what a Schizoid it, it would be helpful to get a quick idea before reading any further. According to the people that come up with this stuff a A Schizoid is someone that is indicated by 4 or more of the following:
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